I do hope you are not scratching your heads in wonder and asking yourselves ‘Who is this Rotate the Completor?’ right now because it’s obvious isn’t it?
After all, he made it very clear in the lyrics of his album ‘Rotate the Completors: Completed Rotations of the….’ that he is the “…man with a Cabbage and an Antelope, a Cantaloupe who tried to steal (his) beer” and also that he has “…the biggest bunch of Salmon eating people that (he) calls his friends.” Not to mention the fact that he doesn’t “have 15 million friends or legs and that’s ok with (him)” or that he “just want(s) to be a house on the hillside.”
Yeah, that Rotate the Completor! So you understand who he is now? ….Oh, you don’t? Well, to be honest neither do I really.
RTC first appeared on the deserted back streets of inner city Tauranga, New Zealand as a geographically challenged busker in late December of 2008. However his foray into the world of busking was a brief one and he was not heard from again until September of 2009 when an audio cassette began to circulate among outsider music fans entitled; the aforementioned ‘Rotate the Completors: Completed Rotations of the….’. Reactions to the contents of this album have varied greatly, but while the mixture of negative and positive reviews have thus far been pretty even, all first time listeners can at least agree on one thing – it’s different and that’s for damn sure!!!
So could you be a potential RTC fan? Well that depends… Do you detest production values? Have a thing for silly voices? Especially when it’s obvious that they have only been affected in order to disguise a massive inability to sing in key? Like warped Guitars? Out of time drums? Like them even better when they are played at the same time? You do? Then you may also like your music started, stopped, sped up, slowed down, thrown around and shaken about? How about an eclectic mix of bluegrass, blues, carnival music, jazz, rock n’ roll, prog, folk and acid rock somehow mashed and blended together? Lyrics about personified Apples, Sea Monkeys, albino Hedgehogs, who also just happen to be deceased and an alcoholic mouse who can’t afford to buy his own drinks? Do you like you album artwork to feature these same characters and to have them drawn by someone with the artistic mindset of an 8 year old? Really,you dig? Well you just might make it as an RTC fan after all.
So at this point if you have answered yes to any of the above questions you may be intrigued and longing to hear RTC for yourself, so head over to MySpace to hear a few songs sampled from ‘RTC’s:Completed Rotations of the…’ and to learn more about this musical genius. But before you do, there are some rules which Rotate the Completor wishes for you to adhere to.
As per the inlay card of ‘Rotate the Completors: Completed Rotations of the…’:
1.) Listen alone. 2.) Listen with head phones on. 3.) Listen only at night. 4.) Only permissible foods to be eaten when listening to ‘R.T.C’s: C.R of the…’ ;cruciferous vegetables, members of the allium genus.
If you like these then your next option is to contact Rotate the Completor at PO Box 2000, Tauranga, New Zealand but be aware thus far RTC has not responded to personal letters, nor has he sold his album for any monetary value, in fact the only way to receive this classic, five star, album is to send a stamped, self addressed envelope with a blank 90 minute audio cassette inside. Generally after 2-3 weeks you will receive your return package but now with a full album recorded on to it, along with one or two other pleasant surprises in most cases.
And don’t expect to make a friend out of your new hero nor expect him to come to your home town playing sold out live shows any time soon because either due to misanthropy, introversion, mental illness, a good sense of mystery, laziness, lack of self confidence or a combination of all of the above he has made very little effort to self promote his work. In fact the majority of all publicity for RTC has been generated by rabid fans desperate to get exposure for him so that he may get over his personal issues and step forth to take his mantle as New Zealands greatest musician.
So now that you’ve heard it? What did you think? You loved it? Of course you did….so run along now and spread the word. Rotate the Completor is the new sheriff in town.